1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,878
{\an8}[theme music playing]

2
00:00:06,089 --> 00:00:08,341
- Hey, guys.
- Hey.

3
00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:10,176
Long day at work, huh, Ma?

4
00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:11,803
We were gonna have dinner without you,

5
00:00:11,803 --> 00:00:13,805
Then we remembered
you're the one who cooks.

6
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:16,725
[canned laughter]

7
00:00:16,725 --> 00:00:19,602
Van, I work, you don't.
Who do you think should cook?

8
00:00:19,602 --> 00:00:21,771
I think it should be the TV guy who goes,

9
00:00:21,771 --> 00:00:23,481
"Bam!" But he's not here.

10
00:00:25,108 --> 00:00:27,152
Are you tryin' to get a whuppin'?

11
00:00:31,531 --> 00:00:33,616
Something tells me
you haven't found your assistant.

12
00:00:33,616 --> 00:00:35,994
Just make sure to check
all the references, Mom.

13
00:00:36,119 --> 00:00:38,538
Well, I've talked to all
their parole officers.

14
00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:41,541
Well, a bunch of people called here today.

15
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,668
I've been on the phone all day.

16
00:00:43,668 --> 00:00:46,796
- Boy, unemployed people are sure chatty.
- Yeah.

17
00:00:48,256 --> 00:00:50,842
Well, I'm desperate.
Does anybody sound interesting?

18
00:00:50,842 --> 00:00:52,135
Tell her about that guy

19
00:00:52,135 --> 00:00:54,220
that called this afternoon.
He sounded really good.

20
00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:55,472
- He did? Tell me.
- Yeah.

21
00:00:55,472 --> 00:00:58,475
Well, let's see. He's in his early 20s,
married, has a kid.

22
00:00:58,475 --> 00:00:59,893
Sounded like a pretty cool guy.

23
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,352
He really wanted the job.

24
00:01:01,352 --> 00:01:04,814
Oh, my gosh. That's him, that's the guy.
Oh, give me his number.

25
00:01:04,814 --> 00:01:07,192
- I don't think he left it.
- Why? He had to.

26
00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:08,526
See if he left a message.

27
00:01:08,526 --> 00:01:09,694
Okay. I'll go do that.

28
00:01:09,694 --> 00:01:11,571
Why don't you start shaking a pot?

29
00:01:16,326 --> 00:01:19,120
We got to find him.
How much does a bounty hunter cost?

30
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:22,999
Wow. You're really worked up
about this, huh?

31
00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:25,710
Cheyenne, you have no idea
what's it like out there.

32
00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:29,047
One guy wanted two weeks off
so he could go back to Middle-earth.

33
00:01:30,757 --> 00:01:33,218
Oh, you know what? I know what to do.

34
00:01:33,218 --> 00:01:36,054
You dial star 69.
It will call him right back.

35
00:01:36,054 --> 00:01:37,889
- Nobody used the phone since he called?
- No.

36
00:01:37,889 --> 00:01:40,225
- Oh, my god.
- Yeah.

37
00:01:41,851 --> 00:01:43,645
Hello? Hi, don't hang up on me.

38
00:01:43,645 --> 00:01:45,939
My name's Reba Hart
and I got a job for you.

39
00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:48,233
And my name's
Van Montgomery and I'll take it!

40
00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:57,867
[Reba] Ha, hey!

41
00:01:57,867 --> 00:02:00,495
{\an8}<i>♪ My roots are planted in the past ♪</i>

42
00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:03,081
{\an8}<i>♪ Though my life is changing fast ♪</i>

43
00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:06,251
<i>♪ Who I am is who I want to be ♪</i>

44
00:02:07,627 --> 00:02:10,255
{\an8}<i>♪ A single mom who works too hard ♪</i>

45
00:02:10,255 --> 00:02:12,799
<i>♪ Who loves her kids and never stops ♪</i>

46
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,300
<i>♪ With gentle hands ♪</i>

47
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:18,138
{\an8}<i>♪ And the heart of a fighter ♪</i>

48
00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:22,809
{\an8}<i>♪ I'm a survivor ♪</i>

49
00:02:25,019 --> 00:02:28,940
[theme music playing]

50
00:02:28,940 --> 00:02:31,776
Okay, Jake, since Van's gonna be
working with me,

51
00:02:31,776 --> 00:02:34,529
you'll be home alone
for about an hour after school.

52
00:02:34,529 --> 00:02:35,613
You gonna be okay?

53
00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:38,116
Don't worry, Mom. I'll be fine.

54
00:02:38,116 --> 00:02:41,411
{\an8}I have everyone's phone number
and a box of matches to play with.

55
00:02:43,746 --> 00:02:45,290
{\an8}Well, on the plus side,

56
00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:47,417
{\an8}the house will be
full of firemen when I get home.

57
00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:49,961
{\an8}Scoot.

58
00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:52,338
I'm gonna be alone
in the house after school.

59
00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:55,091
Tell some of your girlfriends to stop by.

60
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:01,639
Van, hurry up!
We're gonna be late for work!

61
00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:05,059
{\an8}Y'know, the boss shouldn't have to say,
"Get outta your pajamas."

62
00:03:07,562 --> 00:03:09,439
{\an8}So, it's true, Mom?
You actually hired Van?

63
00:03:09,439 --> 00:03:10,732
{\an8}Yes, I did.

64
00:03:11,399 --> 00:03:13,985
{\an8}Y'know, maybe I should've
thought about it a moment more.

65
00:03:13,985 --> 00:03:16,112
{\an8}But, y'know,
give the family a chance, right?

66
00:03:17,405 --> 00:03:18,865
{\an8}Van's better than nothin'.

67
00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:23,536
Right, Kyra?

68
00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:28,291
You'd be better off with tying a monkey
and letting it loose in your office.

69
00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:31,920
Come on, Van. Let's go!

70
00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:35,798
Van, come on~

71
00:03:36,507 --> 00:03:39,177
Van Montgomery, at your service.

72
00:03:41,554 --> 00:03:43,681
{\an8}Well, hello, little lady.`

73
00:03:43,681 --> 00:03:45,850
{\an8}Would you like to buy a house? [chuckles]

74
00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:52,607
{\an8}Seriously, Mom. [chittering]

75
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:57,695
{\an8}Van, you're not selling houses,
you're my assistant.

76
00:03:57,695 --> 00:03:59,781
{\an8}Who happens to be late
for his first day of work.

77
00:03:59,781 --> 00:04:02,951
Oh, come on, I'm golden.
I'm married to the boss' daughter.

78
00:04:05,370 --> 00:04:07,538
There, he is. Hey, Van.

79
00:04:07,538 --> 00:04:09,916
I brought you something
for your first day on the job.

80
00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:11,751
That's my very first briefcase.

81
00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,253
- Wow.
- Yeah.

82
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,505
It must be a hundred years old.

83
00:04:20,718 --> 00:04:22,136
It, uh...

84
00:04:23,179 --> 00:04:24,389
Smells like socks.

85
00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:29,394
Yeah, I used to carry my workout gear
in there back in the '80s.

86
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:32,063
You know,
I was the only straight guy at Jazzercise.

87
00:04:34,899 --> 00:04:35,942
[groans]

88
00:04:38,361 --> 00:04:41,155
[sighs] So, Reba. Very smart.

89
00:04:41,155 --> 00:04:43,950
Hiring somebody in the family
that you could trust.

90
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:47,120
You know, especially somebody
who can type 80 words a minute.

91
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,871
What? I can't type that fast.

92
00:04:48,871 --> 00:04:50,999
Oh, no. Wait a minute, that's me.

93
00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:52,125
[chuckles]

94
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,628
Van must be the person in the family

95
00:04:55,628 --> 00:04:58,673
who's taken several
computer classes at The Y.

96
00:04:58,673 --> 00:05:01,009
Oh, shoot, no. That's me.
[chuckles awkwardly]

97
00:05:02,510 --> 00:05:04,595
[sighs] CPR Class? Me.

98
00:05:04,595 --> 00:05:07,181
License to operate a backhoe? Me.

99
00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:12,228
Barbra Jean, the reason
I didn't ask you for the job

100
00:05:12,228 --> 00:05:14,731
is because you said
you always wanted to be a full-time mom.

101
00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:18,067
- Oh, thank you for respecting that.
- You're welcome.

102
00:05:18,067 --> 00:05:19,485
So, that's the only reason

103
00:05:19,485 --> 00:05:20,820
- you didn't hire me?
- Yes.

104
00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:23,406
- That, and the you-being-crazy thing.
- Oh.

105
00:05:25,700 --> 00:05:27,577
You two have fun. I'm sure it'll be great.

106
00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:29,078
Oh. absolutely.

107
00:05:29,078 --> 00:05:30,621
Unless somebody has a heart attack

108
00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:31,956
or needs me to dig a trench.

109
00:05:31,956 --> 00:05:33,416
[chuckles awkwardly]

110
00:05:33,416 --> 00:05:35,001
- I'll keep my cell on.
- Yeah.

111
00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:39,422
Are you excited, Van?
Ready to get started?

112
00:05:39,422 --> 00:05:42,091
You bet, but you know what?
This morning's practically shot.

113
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:44,010
Can we just go straight to lunch?

114
00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:48,181
Well, the morning is practically shot

115
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:51,476
'Cause you didn't get out of bed
until I put that waffle under your nose.

116
00:05:52,351 --> 00:05:53,770
So, it wasn't a dream.

117
00:05:56,981 --> 00:05:59,525
Look, Van.
I need you to take this seriously.

118
00:05:59,525 --> 00:06:02,195
This is more than just a job to me.
It's my career.

119
00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:03,988
And what you do reflects on me.

120
00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:05,573
Got it. Okay.

121
00:06:05,573 --> 00:06:08,201
In that case, I'll need
another half hour with the hair dryer.

122
00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:10,870
No, you're fine. No. Listen.

123
00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:14,332
All you need to do is remember
the three Ps to be a good employee.

124
00:06:14,332 --> 00:06:17,168
Wow, good thing there aren't two
or it'd be "pee-pee."

125
00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:18,586
[canned laughter]

126
00:06:25,009 --> 00:06:28,638
Punctuality, preparedness,
and professionalism. Got it?

127
00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:30,473
Got it, okay. No, I wasn't listening.

128
00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:32,016
I was still thinking about my hair.

129
00:06:33,684 --> 00:06:35,228
Here, let me get it for you.

130
00:06:35,853 --> 00:06:36,771
Now, let's go!

131
00:06:45,863 --> 00:06:48,699
[theme music playing]

132
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:56,874
Hey, Mom?
I'm gonna ride my bike down the stairs.

133
00:06:58,292 --> 00:07:00,419
What's that? You're at work?

134
00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:05,550
Sweet.

135
00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:07,969
Hey, Jakey.

136
00:07:07,969 --> 00:07:11,222
I thought since we're both alone,
we could spend some time together.

137
00:07:11,222 --> 00:07:13,391
Now's not the best time, Barbra Jean.

138
00:07:14,475 --> 00:07:18,146
Jake! You are not gonna ride
that bike down those stairs.

139
00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:20,898
- It is too dangerous.
- That's what makes it fun.

140
00:07:22,733 --> 00:07:24,819
Haven't you ever done anything dangerous?

141
00:07:26,654 --> 00:07:28,156
Well...

142
00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:29,574
No.

143
00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:33,119
My parents were really strict and mean.
They never let me do anything.

144
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,996
I don't see your parents around.

145
00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:39,500
[chuckles]

146
00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:45,840
Now, remember, Barbra Jean,

147
00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,050
- If you crash, go limp.
- Yeah.

148
00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:52,972
All right, on three.

149
00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:56,434
One, two, and--

150
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:13,117
I tried to stop her. The woman's insane!

151
00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:19,248
You wanna go first?

152
00:08:22,710 --> 00:08:25,630
You know, that's the least crazy thing
I've seen all day.

153
00:08:27,215 --> 00:08:29,717
'Cause I get to work with Van, yeah!

154
00:08:32,386 --> 00:08:37,016
- [Barbra Jean screaming] Yee-haw!
- [clattering on stairs]

155
00:08:37,725 --> 00:08:38,976
Yeah!

156
00:08:39,685 --> 00:08:40,770
Yeah.

157
00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:49,320
So, Reba.
Things didn't go well with Van today?

158
00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:51,614
Kyra was right.
I should have hired a monkey.

159
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:56,953
Oh, Reba, you can't.
The laws are so strict.

160
00:08:59,622 --> 00:09:01,082
I could just kill Van.

161
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:03,918
See, I was showing this house to a couple
for like, the fifth time,

162
00:09:03,918 --> 00:09:05,670
- when Van comes in, late.
- Mm-hm.

163
00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:08,339
Grabs a couple of beers
and says to the husband,

164
00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:11,008
"Hey, dude. You wanna go outside
and shoot some hoops?"

165
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:13,219
Men and balls.

166
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,845
[sing-songs] Bur-da-burp-burp.

167
00:09:17,181 --> 00:09:18,641
[Reba] Oh, Cheyenne, honey.

168
00:09:19,475 --> 00:09:21,602
I think I'm having second thoughts
about your husband.

169
00:09:21,602 --> 00:09:23,437
Too late. Should've piped up
at the wedding.

170
00:09:23,437 --> 00:09:26,399
Cheyenne, he started
to interfere with my clients.

171
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:28,192
I think he cost me sale today.

172
00:09:28,192 --> 00:09:30,528
Look, Mom. I have got a lot going on.

173
00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,697
For eight hours a day, he's your problem.

174
00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:35,157
- Fine.
- [door closes]

175
00:09:36,117 --> 00:09:37,076
When Van gets home,

176
00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:38,995
- we're gonna have a long chat.
- Yeah.

177
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:41,581
'Cause I won't allow him out there
making me look bad.

178
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:44,834
[screams] I sold those people the house!

179
00:09:47,169 --> 00:09:49,797
[grunting excitedly]

180
00:09:49,797 --> 00:09:52,592
[theme music playing]

181
00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:58,222
[theme music playing]

182
00:09:58,973 --> 00:09:59,974
What did you say?

183
00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:03,144
I said, "I sold those people the house."

184
00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:07,356
Van, you couldn't have
sold them that house.

185
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:10,026
- You were outside, playing basketball.
- That's how I did it.

186
00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:12,153
I didn't want him to just buy the house.

187
00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:14,947
I wanted him
to buy the neighborhood, the lifestyle.

188
00:10:15,531 --> 00:10:17,450
That's how that guy sold me the kayak.

189
00:10:19,076 --> 00:10:20,202
Well, that's just--

190
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:22,204
Wow!

191
00:10:22,997 --> 00:10:23,998
Good for you.

192
00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:27,501
Good for us. I couldn't have done it
without you distracting his wife.

193
00:10:28,919 --> 00:10:31,505
Well, maybe me showing the wife the house

194
00:10:31,505 --> 00:10:33,424
had something to do with the decision too.

195
00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:36,093
Nah, after you left,
she was against buying it.

196
00:10:36,093 --> 00:10:39,430
But then, I showed Cindy the garden,
and she was hooked!

197
00:10:40,222 --> 00:10:43,059
You see, Mrs. H,
you gotta know your buyer.

198
00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,935
For Tony and Cindy,

199
00:10:45,728 --> 00:10:47,563
shootin' hoop and buying a few beers

200
00:10:47,563 --> 00:10:51,317
made that house
feel like that could be their home.

201
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:54,528
[sings] <i>♪ Home, home on the range ♪</i>

202
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:57,031
<i>♪ Where the... ♪</i>

203
00:10:57,823 --> 00:11:00,242
We were singing that.
I'm still kinda buzzed.

204
00:11:01,869 --> 00:11:02,912
[cellphone ringing]

205
00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:04,747
Oh, hey.

206
00:11:04,747 --> 00:11:06,165
Oh! That's Tony and Cindy.

207
00:11:06,707 --> 00:11:09,794
Hey! Talk to big daddy, Van! Yeah!

208
00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,257
Reba?

209
00:11:15,925 --> 00:11:17,259
Are you okay? Your...

210
00:11:17,968 --> 00:11:20,096
Your face is starting
to get all red. It's...

211
00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:22,348
Starting to match your hair.

212
00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:26,811
No, I'm fine. I'm happy for Van.

213
00:11:28,270 --> 00:11:31,232
I think it's great
that he can just waltz in,

214
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,691
make a sale without even trying

215
00:11:32,691 --> 00:11:34,944
after I've done
all the groundwork for two weeks.

216
00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:38,823
- Well, you don't sound happy.
- Well, I am!

217
00:11:42,243 --> 00:11:44,995
Well, all I know
if that my son-in-law did this--

218
00:11:45,746 --> 00:11:48,958
Well, which would be weird
'cause, you know, I only have a son,

219
00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:50,793
which mean Henry would be gay, you know?

220
00:11:53,379 --> 00:11:55,172
I mean, I'd love him
just the same, you know.

221
00:11:56,590 --> 00:11:58,008
But I don't think he's gay.

222
00:11:59,301 --> 00:12:00,719
But he sure does know his colors.

223
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:05,224
I'm gonna go home.

224
00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:08,310
[theme music playing]

225
00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:17,153
Okay, Jake, if I can't trust you at home,

226
00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:18,487
I'm gonna hire a babysitter.

227
00:12:18,487 --> 00:12:21,490
Cool. Babysitters are hot.

228
00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,538
I hate this age. Go upstairs to your room.

229
00:12:30,207 --> 00:12:32,751
Howdy, partner. Hey, check this out.

230
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:37,715
"Montgomery-Hart, 'cause you gotta have...

231
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:39,300
"Montgomery."

232
00:12:40,968 --> 00:12:42,052
See what I did there?

233
00:12:42,052 --> 00:12:45,556
You thought it'll read, ''Cause you gotta
have Hart." I went the other way.

234
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:49,810
I would've gone the normal way,
then again, I'm normal.

235
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,564
- What's this for, exactly?
- We could be partners.

236
00:12:53,564 --> 00:12:55,858
[chuckles] No, we really
couldn't be partners

237
00:12:55,858 --> 00:12:57,902
'cause you don't have
your real estate license.

238
00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:58,944
Eh, details.

239
00:12:58,944 --> 00:13:02,072
Ha! Not details. It's the law.

240
00:13:02,072 --> 00:13:05,284
That is what's so great.
You know the law and I don't care.

241
00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:11,248
Van, being a real estate agent is hard.
Not everybody can do it.

242
00:13:11,248 --> 00:13:14,168
Are you forgetting that I sold a house?

243
00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:17,421
Are you forgetting
that I own the house you live in?

244
00:13:19,173 --> 00:13:22,259
Hey, Van. How'd work go?
How many houses did you sell today?

245
00:13:22,259 --> 00:13:24,053
Still just the one the but the big news

246
00:13:24,053 --> 00:13:26,305
is that Mrs. H and I
are gonna be partners.

247
00:13:27,014 --> 00:13:28,390
Partners?

248
00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:30,684
I hope you're talking about
fighting crime.

249
00:13:34,230 --> 00:13:36,440
No, and we're not gonna be partners.

250
00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:39,235
But, Mrs. H, we'll work so great together.

251
00:13:39,235 --> 00:13:41,445
You come in all stern,
and technical, like,

252
00:13:41,445 --> 00:13:43,364
[grunts] "Look at the closet."

253
00:13:43,364 --> 00:13:45,282
"Look at the square footage."

254
00:13:45,866 --> 00:13:47,409
And then, I come in, all cool.

255
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:52,081
"Hey, I'm Van. What's up?
Wanna buy a house?"

256
00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:54,458
And they do.

257
00:13:54,458 --> 00:13:55,876
You show the house.

258
00:13:55,876 --> 00:13:56,961
I sell the house.

259
00:13:56,961 --> 00:13:59,088
You talk 'em to death, I sell the house.

260
00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:02,591
I talk 'em to death, Van?

261
00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:04,176
Like talking about the school systems

262
00:14:04,176 --> 00:14:05,261
and plumbing and roofing?

263
00:14:05,261 --> 00:14:07,054
She can go on like that for hours.

264
00:14:08,430 --> 00:14:11,934
Hey, Van. You may be
misreading the situation.

265
00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:15,062
No, I'm not. Are you guys
forgetting that I sold a house?

266
00:14:15,062 --> 00:14:17,606
No! Because you won't let us forget it!

267
00:14:22,611 --> 00:14:24,113
You...

268
00:14:24,113 --> 00:14:25,698
Ripped my flier.

269
00:14:30,911 --> 00:14:32,913
We won't be partners.
We'll never be partners!

270
00:14:32,913 --> 00:14:34,832
In fact, I'll go the other way.
You're fired.

271
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:36,250
You're firing me?

272
00:14:36,250 --> 00:14:37,751
This came out of the blue.

273
00:14:37,751 --> 00:14:39,169
No, really, it didn't.

274
00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:41,338
I had it doodled all over my day planner.

275
00:14:41,338 --> 00:14:44,967
All right, fine.
Fine. I'll get another job.

276
00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:48,846
Maybe I should find something
I'm not good at so no one's upset!

277
00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:51,473
[door slams]

278
00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:59,148
Well, Reba, what happened there?

279
00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:01,650
I mean, don't get me wrong,
I'm happy it wasn't me, for once,

280
00:15:01,650 --> 00:15:03,152
but still--

281
00:15:05,446 --> 00:15:06,739
I don't know.

282
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,073
I wanna be happy for him.

283
00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:10,200
I should be happy for him!

284
00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:12,828
I mean, he's my son-in-law.
He did a great thing!

285
00:15:12,828 --> 00:15:14,538
Yeah. And?

286
00:15:14,538 --> 00:15:16,707
And part of me wants to be happy for him.

287
00:15:16,707 --> 00:15:19,919
And the other part
just wants to smack him upside the head.

288
00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:25,674
It's totally understandable
you're a bit jealous.

289
00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:28,886
I mean, he made a quick sale.
He's young. He's good-lookin'.

290
00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:31,347
He eats like a pig
and stays in marvelous shape.

291
00:15:33,307 --> 00:15:37,144
I mean, if I weren't exactly like him,
hey, I'd wanna smack him, too.

292
00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:38,687
[softly] Yeah.

293
00:15:40,564 --> 00:15:43,067
So you don't think I'm a terrible person
for feeling this way

294
00:15:43,067 --> 00:15:44,234
- No.
- [sighs]

295
00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:49,323
It's just that it's so easy for him,
and so hard for me.

296
00:15:49,323 --> 00:15:50,824
I have a lot ridin' on this.

297
00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:53,035
Sometimes I lie in bed at night

298
00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:55,079
and wonder what'll happen
if this don't work out.

299
00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:58,207
Remember when I got out of college

300
00:15:58,207 --> 00:16:00,209
- and we started the dental practice?
- Yeah.

301
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:03,128
I was nervous, made tons of mistakes.
Remember what happened?

302
00:16:03,128 --> 00:16:04,922
We got that malpractice insurance?

303
00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:10,761
[chuckles] No, I relaxed,
and everything worked out.

304
00:16:11,303 --> 00:16:13,263
Okay? You're just too uptight. I mean--

305
00:16:13,263 --> 00:16:15,474
Van sold that house
because he was relaxed.

306
00:16:15,474 --> 00:16:17,601
He was just being himself
and people can sense that.

307
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:19,979
You think I should be more like Van?

308
00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:22,815
- Well, yeah.
- Oh, come on, Brock!

309
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:25,109
I got three important
appointments tomorrow,

310
00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,528
I can't act like some surfer
on cough medicine.

311
00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:29,071
[laughs]

312
00:16:31,031 --> 00:16:32,449
You don't have to act like him,

313
00:16:32,449 --> 00:16:34,868
You just think like him. Give it a try.

314
00:16:34,868 --> 00:16:36,161
No.

315
00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:38,831
Okay, fine. Fine, don't change. Be all,

316
00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:40,666
[grunts] "Look at the closets."

317
00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:46,171
Okay, fine. I'll think like Van.

318
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:48,465
- [groans] That hurts.
- [chuckles]

319
00:16:50,551 --> 00:16:52,886
Just make your mind go completely blank.

320
00:16:54,888 --> 00:16:56,306
Hi. I'm Barbra Jean.

321
00:17:03,897 --> 00:17:07,818
[theme music playing]

322
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:16,535
[knocking at door]

323
00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:21,123
Van! It's noon.

324
00:17:21,123 --> 00:17:23,667
Get up. Rise and shine.

325
00:17:24,460 --> 00:17:27,254
Oh, man. I was dreaming about waffles!

326
00:17:28,505 --> 00:17:29,882
Come on, get up.

327
00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:31,884
Get a tie on, boy. We got work to do.

328
00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:34,720
- I thought you're mad at me.
- Why would you think that?

329
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:37,765
Because you yelled at me, fired me,
and tore my flier.

330
00:17:39,975 --> 00:17:41,727
I'm sorry about that, Van.

331
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:46,565
I was feelin', well, insecure,
and I was taking it out on you.

332
00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:50,069
But I don't feel that way anymore
because you know why?

333
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,445
I sold a house this morning.

334
00:17:52,613 --> 00:17:53,989
What? You?

335
00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:55,157
Yes. Yes.

336
00:17:56,075 --> 00:18:00,245
I got to thinking you don't take
anything seriously, so I didn't, and,

337
00:18:00,245 --> 00:18:01,455
it worked.

338
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:04,249
Can you believe it?
You taught me something.

339
00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:10,923
Look, I'm sorry
about all that stuff I said yesterday.

340
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:14,259
It turns out that we could
really be a good team.

341
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:16,595
So, Montgomery-Hart is back in business?

342
00:18:16,595 --> 00:18:20,307
Well, Hart is.
Montgomery is her valuable assistant,

343
00:18:20,307 --> 00:18:21,683
who has lots of talents.

344
00:18:22,601 --> 00:18:25,062
But needs to learn
how to act like a professional.

345
00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:29,566
Oh, come on, Mrs. H. You're the only one
at the office that doesn't go for this.

346
00:18:29,566 --> 00:18:31,735
[grunts]

347
00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:36,156
Van, look.

348
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:40,744
You can have all the good times you want.

349
00:18:40,744 --> 00:18:42,079
But if you don't show up,

350
00:18:42,079 --> 00:18:44,248
act like you know what you're doing
and be prepared,

351
00:18:44,248 --> 00:18:45,833
none of that means anything.

352
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:47,501
That's something you can learn from me.

353
00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:48,961
So get up, get dressed.

354
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:50,879
And let's sell, sell, sell.

355
00:18:51,922 --> 00:18:53,006
We got a busy day today.

356
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:55,884
We got two open houses, a caravan, and a--

357
00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:03,725
An empty liquor bottle.

358
00:19:06,270 --> 00:19:07,312
Van, what's this?

359
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:09,314
Uh...

360
00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:13,777
Well, I, uh--
I was gonna put a ship in it.

361
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:19,950
Van, is this why you've been sleepin' late

362
00:19:19,950 --> 00:19:21,285
and not showing up for stuff?

363
00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:24,246
Because having a few beers
is one thing, but...

364
00:19:26,123 --> 00:19:27,916
Hiding bottles in your closet is not good.

365
00:19:27,916 --> 00:19:29,835
Yeah, but, Mrs. H--

366
00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:34,590
I know.

367
00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:36,884
Van, look. I know it's been
pretty rough for you

368
00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:38,468
since you left football.

369
00:19:38,468 --> 00:19:39,845
But with this real estate thing,

370
00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:42,639
I think you found something
that you can be really good at.

371
00:19:43,807 --> 00:19:45,058
And you'd be plumb stupid

372
00:19:45,058 --> 00:19:47,060
if you let this drinking mess it all up.

373
00:19:48,228 --> 00:19:49,229
- Okay.
- Van.

374
00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:52,816
You need to promise me, this is gonna end.

375
00:19:54,401 --> 00:19:55,360
I promise.

376
00:19:57,988 --> 00:19:58,947
Good.

377
00:20:00,157 --> 00:20:02,034
Get dressed and come on downstairs.

378
00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:04,161
Because next time,
it won't be just a waffle,

379
00:20:04,161 --> 00:20:05,746
it'll be the waffle iron.

380
00:20:08,624 --> 00:20:09,791
- Hey, Ma!
- Hi, Cheyenne.

381
00:20:09,791 --> 00:20:12,252
All right. So I just dropped
Elizabeth off at daycare.

382
00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:14,838
What's wrong?

383
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:18,133
Is this your bottle?

384
00:20:18,258 --> 00:20:20,594
What? [chuckles awkwardly]

385
00:20:21,136 --> 00:20:22,763
Why would you think that is my bottle?

386
00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:25,057
Well, it's not mine,
and if it's not yours,

387
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:27,351
then our three-year-old
has a major problem.

388
00:20:31,188 --> 00:20:32,564
What's going on, Cheyenne?

389
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:39,238
[soft music playing]

390
00:20:41,990 --> 00:20:46,912
[theme music playing]

391
00:21:12,062 --> 00:21:13,605
{\an8}[man] Acme!

392
00:21:13,605 --> 00:21:14,982
{\an8}[coughing]


